Martin LUTHAR King ain't got nuthin' on meOration is my passion. It may not seem as such since most, if not all, of you do not even study where I do but it’s a fact, dear reader.

At present, my passion may not have that spark anymore; but that doesn’t mean that it can’t be ignited again… ;)

Our Rafiqui House has been consistently winning in most, if not all, competition categories and our monthly assembly weeks have been magnificent.

The week starting on 16th February was our last week in matric. Of course, exams sheckzams abhi rehte hein but parhai in school itself is basically khatam-khatam.

In this very last week, the assemblies were to be conducted by the Rafiquis. As of typing, it is 20th of February, 2008; the absolute ending point was today. I was selected by the house master to orate on ‘Character and Character Building’ (which I had skillfully copy-pasted from different websites)…

And boy, have I got a story to tell to you.

I woke up today, groggy-eyed yet ecstatic. After all baee, it’s the last day of school and I’m making a speech.

come out of bed

pee

wash face

dry face

look at face

make face

wear contacts

put on uniform

smear sun-block

“naashta tayaar!”

eggs

honey

toast

throw books in the bag

move out

gate k undar

Fazaia Degree College Risalpur. This is the actual assembly stage.Ahhh, it’s 8:05 AM, 5 minutes to show-time. I walk up to the stage, where I see little children standing, nervous and fearful of their turn. I ask them one by one, “What is your speech topic, son?”

“Bhai it’s kirdaar aur uss ko banana”

“Uncle character building hay!”

What did you say, little girl!? UNCLE!?!?!?! Aur mein? Pffft. Allah karay tum sub say pehlay aunty bunno.

“So you two going to make a speech on Character Building? Coincidentally, my topic is Character Building as well!”

I feel a hand on my shoulder, turning around I recognize the house master of the junior school section.

He says, “Aap ki aaj speech hai? I’m sorry but I cannot allow you to do that. This little girl of my section has been waiting since the last three weeks”

“Sir, today is my last day at school… she can make the speech tomorrow”

“No, you do it tomorrow”

“Kal chutti hai Sir”

“You will do it tomorrow”

“Sir, kal 10th aur 9th walonn ki chutti hai!”

“I said you’ll do it tomorrow”

“Sir…”

“DON’T YOU UNDERSTAND!? YOU WILL DO IT SOME OTHER TIME”

“Hmph. I shall be going now”

you jelly?Hasrat bhari nigahon say I look at the little girl. She’s got a neutral expression but her eyes glint and sparkle! Kutia.

“Can’t you do it tomorrow?”

And here is the reply, “Uncle, I’ve been waiting for three weeks, I cry when I go home, I cry when I talk to my friends, I cry all the time because of this! Mein nahee ja sakti! Please Uncle; try to understand ji, AGAR ABHI MEIN NE NAHEE KYA TOU I’LL START CRYING and you’ll have to go anyway”

What in the world!? I have a look at the paper she holds in her hand, it’s 10 lines long. Wow, it’s sure to have deep spiritual implications and philosophical gup-shup.

“You’re going to say all this?”

“Isn’t it great?”

It was time for me to leave the stage and let the children take over. Let them ruin the last day. Our day. The senior house master who chose me, later scolded the girl. And guess what she did?

Bitch.

Note: As you can probably guess by now, this was written three years ago. So don’t hate on me for being a little arrogant to the little girl. :P

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